Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
Lily Pie
Monday, August 16, 2010
Today was THE day :(
I just got home from dropping my sweet baby off at daycare ;( Her Daddy is at work. The dogs are outside playing. Our house is strangely silent ~ no exersaucer, no swing, no playmat, no wonderful cooing or squealing, no crying. Oh how I would welcome that crying right now just to know that she was with me. Our house has been so filled with love and joy since Sophie came into this world. Even when she is sleeping so soundly, her spirit fills this house in ways that I can't explain. She just belongs here ~ and sitting here without her feels as if I have lost part of myself. There is an empty place right now that I know won't be filled until I pick her up in my arms and have my baby back. My heart is broken and yet, I know that this is going be ok. That I will get through the tears, worry and fear eventually ~ day by day. I'm sure today will be mostly crying and worrying ~ perhaps even a half-hearted attempt to stay busy. There are a million things I could be doing and yet, I just don't care to do them right now. Maybe a little later I'll pick myself up and get busy. For now, I'm just being. I miss my baby and I am sad. And for now that's ok.
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3 comments:
Stay strong sweetie! I remember my first time too. I didn't go back to work, but took him to the sitter and went home to get stuff done. I couldn't! I missed him sooo much! yes, even the crying like you! It does get easier, though it will always be hard. But seeing that smile and open arms when you go to pick her up will make you forget about your work day!
Holly ~ Yes, this is our transition week. I could be cleaning or something I know. But for now I'm just sitting. Maybe work will actually be a welcome distraction next week ~ but for now I'm still dreading going back. The good thing is since I'm at home, she isn't staying all day!!!
I am SOOO proud of you-I can only imagine how difficult a day it was for you...but look, you did it!! And I think you are right, every day will be a tiny bit easier. I am sure it will make the time you do have with her that much more special (as if it's not already). Thankfully, she loves it and I am sure this will be a great thing for her....in so many way. Stay strong my friend-love you!
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